50 Hilarious Tree Puns (Try Not to Laugh)

Emily Polash
Written by Emily Polash Updated on February 14th, 2023

Trees glorious trees! Those big leafy giants play an important role in every child’s life. They inspire hours of wholesome play, climbing, fortress building, and conker battles.

It’s no joke that trees have always captured our imaginations with their gigantic and magical appearance. So it’s little wonder that they feature in fairy tales such as Hansel and Gretel and Snow White.

And so… your kids love trees, and now they’ll dig these unbe-leaf-ably funny tree puns and jokes. Watch them giggle and why not branch out and think of a few more yourself.

  1. I can recommend my tree dentist. She’s very good at root canals.
  2. What did the tree sing at the party? Happy Birchday to Yew!
  3. I’m totally stumped by this pun.
  4. My baby loves that silly song with the actions. You know, “baby bark, do do, do do do do!”
  5. I’m so sappy, I could maple you cry.
  6. The Grandma tree won Masterchef USA with a tree-fle.
  7. I’m so twiggy, I could make you branch out.
  8. Willow you ever get tired of puns?
  9.  I can’t help laughing, this pun is tree-mendous.
  10. What did the tree say when it was fired? I’ve been turned to Ash!
  11.  The best tree detective ever is Miss Maple.
  12.  Pine tree won the race, he came fir-st.
  13. What did the tree say to the woodcutter? You’re making me board.
  14.  Our favourite documentary is Born Tree.
  15. Did you hear about the tree on Housewives of Atlanta? It was really giving shade.
  16. What did the tree say when it was asked to make a decision? I’m stuck between a rock and a hardwood place!
  17.  I really want tickets to go and see A-dell.
  18. What did the beech tree say when it was asked to play in the band? I don’t have a ins-trunk-ment
  19. The fortune teller at the tree fair mysteriously said, “cross my palm with silver”.
  20. This pun is so bad it should be cut down.
  21.  Did you hear about the tree who went to hospital? He had a sap transfusion.
  22. Where did the tree go to relax? On the beeches of Tree-nidad.
  23. Said the coconut to the palm tree? “You crack me up!”
  24. Have you heard who sang the song Respect? Yes, it was A-tree-tha Franklin.
  25. What did a romantic tree say to another. “Let’s live sappily ever after.”
  26.  Trees are great at basketball because they always get slam-trunks.
  27.  What did the tree do on stage? Took a bough.
  28. I always laugh at Bark Simpson’s antics on TV.
  29. What did the tree council do to make the roads safe. Put in a speed-stump!
  30.  Which of Boy George’s songs is the tree’s favourite? Bough down Mister
  31. Why did the tree go on Who Do You Think You Are? Because it wanted to go back to its roots.
  32. What’s a tree’s favourite snack? Twiglets.
  33. How do you confuse a tree? You stump it.
  34. What do you call a tree that’s been stumped? A stumpkin.
  35. Tree dogs: their bark is worse than their bite!
  36. What a great tree! Poplar is so popular.
  37. Why was the tree so brave? Because it was always ready to go out on a limb.
  38. Why did the pine tree get a new hairstyle? To look more fir-tastic.
  39.  Did you hear about the tree mathematician? He was great at tree-ganomitry.
  40.  Trees love to dance, especially contempora-tree.
  41. Where do trees go on ski holidays? Ashpen.
  42. Houdini was a great tree magician as he disappeared in an Ash!
  43. Where did the tree go on holiday? To the beech.
  44. My kids love to watch Beau-tree and the Beast. 
  45. This year I put up my Christmas tree and I thought it looked spruce-acular.
  46. What did the Christmas tree say to the presents? Let’s wrap this up.
  47. When my Christmas tree was taken down, I said, “I pine for you already”.
  1. When Officer Squirrel apprehended the criminals, he said “Pop that trunk! Show me your acorns”!
  2. What did the Amazon delivery man see written on the tree? Knock on wood.
  3.  My neighbour was angry with my dog Spot. He was barking up the wrong tree. 
Emily Polash
Written by Emily Polash Updated on February 14th, 2023