Check out these bone puns and jokes that’ll be sure to have you holding your sides with laughter.
It’s fascinating to know that the 206 bones in our body support us and allow us to move. They protect our brain, heart, and other organs from injury. Our bones also store minerals such as calcium which help keep our bones strong.
Skeletons and bones are eery reminders of the otherworld, death, and human mortality. Halloween and the Day of The Dead celebrate skeletons and bones in a funny and delightful way.
So let’s entertain you with these humerus jokes and have a laugh.
- Why did the bone doctor not come when paged? He was bone-idle.
- My leg is very angry with my foot. It has a bone to pick.
- I’m so boney that I’m practically a skeleton key.
- What happened when the bone got locked in the freezer? It was chilled to the bone.
- I went to the doctor as I had a pain in my neck. It was a bone in the throat.
- Why don’t skeletons have puppies? They are like a dog with a bone.
- Skeletons make great detectives. The’ve got eyes in the back of their skull.
- Bones loves to eat vegetables especially marrow.
- Where do bones go to school? College-n.
- Why don’t fossils like to laugh? Because it takes them a million years to crack a joke.
- The bone went to the hairdressers and said ‘cut close to the bone’.
- Whenever bone saw the boss he hid. That’s what he tend-oned to do.
- Why does bones make such good riders? Because they put the horse before the cart-ilage.
- Mr Thigh loves seafood restaurants mainly to eat the muscles.
- Why did the skeleton get the job as x-ray specialist? He was a real graft-er.
- I don’t really like my neighbour Mr Skull. He’s a bone-head.
- Why did the bones go to the bank? To open a joint account.
- After rib-cage went to the health farm he came back and he was all skin and bones.
- What happened with the dispute over the elephant bone graveyard? It’s still a bone of contention.
- Skull was angry with the hairdresser. After he left he found a hair-line fracture.
- What’s a skeleton’s favorite song? Dem Bones Dem Bones Dem Dry Bones.
- Did you hear about the bone school’s head-master. He was very stern-um.
- How did the elephant deal with his naughty child? He took him to tusk.
- The skeleton chose an outfit for the Haloween party. It was all skin and bone.
- Why did the policeman apprehend the bone? He was a pick-socket.
- What did the skeleton baseball player do when he won? Threw his knee-cap in the air.
- The bone sneezed. He needed a tissue.
- What’s a skull’s favorite desert? Bone-ana split.
- I bought a massage chair for my thigh bone. It vertebrae-ted amazingly.
- The comic made me laugh so much I broke my funny bone.
- My femur helped me get a leg up in the competition.
- The bone party was broken up by the cops. There was skull-duggery afoot.
- How did the skeleton pay for his trip? With pounds of flesh.
- Skeleton was involved in an acident today. He m-arrowly escaped.
- Why don’t skeletons ever go out on the town? They don’t have any-body to go with.
- What do skeletons say before eating their dinner? Bone-appetit
- Did you hear about the strong rib-cage? He was femur-able.
- Skeleton became homeless but luckily found a house and now has a tendon-cy agreement.
- Mr Bone was so tired he was lymph-less.
- What’s a skeleton’s favorite singer? Pelvis Presley.
- Why did the skeleton put his head in the icy river? To be a numb-skull.
- Where do rib-cages grow apples? In the bone orchard.
- What song to bones like to dance to? I’m spine-ing around.
- How did the skeleton smell so well? There was no skin off his nose.
- I tried to tell a joke about the tibia, but it was too knee-slapping.
- Why did the skeleton disappear? There were no bone about it.
- How do you know a skeleton is old? They are long in the tooth.
- When bones need fixing they use a tissue-driver.
- My knee-cap went to prison for breaking and entering. It was bad to the bone.
- Bone-atello was a great artist and skull-ptor.
